After reading Judy Brady’s essay, “I want a wife”, from Ms. Magazine in 1971, I don’t think that you can truly compare the wife from 1971 to the wife of today.
While yes, in 1971 the role of the wife was probably closer to what Brady portrays then today, I believe that Brady embellished as to how the wife is the SOLE provider of care to the children and is solely responsible for all upkeep of the house. Judy Brady’s writing gives me the sense that she was a very bitter ex-wife and did not have a very happy marriage. As a Husband, Father, and former single parent (yes, I am the custodial parent of my children from my first marriage.) I believe that I can paint a more accurate picture of both roles today.
I am currently 33 years old and am finishing my college degree; second to my wife who has already completed hers, but that does not take away from any of my family duties. I am just as active in all 4 of my children’s lives as my wife is. I give baths, do laundry for them, go to parent-teacher conferences, take time off from work for Doctor Appointments, and get up with little ones in the middle of the night. I definitely don’t feel like I am the minority for husbands either. I know of several other husbands/fathers who are just as involved. In fact a close friend of mine is a stay at home dad, something of which is becoming a lot more common. I also do almost all of the cooking for our family along with doing a fair share of the grocery shopping and meal planning.. Along with helping to keep the house clean, I take care of all the yard work and make sure vehicle maintenance is kept up. If something goes wrong with a major appliance, I fix it or make the arrangements for it to be fixed.
The brief picture I just gave you I am sure is not the same in every household today, but I do believe that it is more common than not. Husbands of today are a lot more versatile then of 1971. Part of this I’m sure is do in part to the large women’s movements that were taking place at that time. Today more and more husbands are becoming stay at home dads in part due to wives having a stronger presence in the workforce. The number of men who are raising children on their own is also growing; mother’s always getting custody after a divorce is not the standard today.
When reading Judy Brady’s essay, I also believe that it is important to not only keep that era in mind, but to also keep demographics in mind. What is acceptable or the norm in the Midwest or the south is not always the same for the east or west coast. Different parts of our country have different values and beliefs and we past those values and beliefs down to our children. Without trying to stereotype, noticing that Brady was born in San Francisco, I would be curious to know if that is where she grew up as well. I would venture to say that women activists are stronger on the Coast then they are in the Midwest. If that statement sounds sexist, I apologize. The point I’m getting at is that the Midwest has traditionally always been a few steps behind the Coast in everything from technology and music to fashion and political movements.
I don’t think that Brady’s essay is at all meaningless, if anything I think it serves as a reminder to how much the role of husband/wife has evolved over the past thirty years.
Matthew Smith
Blog Assignment 3
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1 comment:
Very nice writing. You introduce and offer a thesis, give your points, and conclude with a short summary comment.
I think that your comment--about the fact that the essay is useful insofar as it points out the changes in the past 30 years--is astute.
It is difficult, though, to make generalizations, particularly about such a closely-held situation as one's home life. Katie's perspective is very different from yours (and Brian's and Matt's), and I think there's something to be said for both.
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